In this article, we explore findings from two recent studies that provide actionable ways to lead a happier and more meaningful life. These strategies focus on "life shaping" and "becoming the hero of your own story."
What is Life Shaping?
Life shaping involves making intentional changes to take control of your future, meet essential psychological needs (like autonomy and freedom), and live a life that feels authentic and fulfilling.
A recent study published in 'Emerging Adulthood' by Napier and colleagues highlights how life-shaping activities can help young adults create more meaningful and authentic lives.
These activities typically include identifying personal values, pursuing genuine interests, building supportive relationships, setting goals, and crafting a meaningful personal narrative.
Key Elements of Life Shaping
Here are some components of life-shaping activities, along with examples of questions and reflections that can help guide this process:
1. Values:
From a list of values, identify the ones that resonate most with you. Reflect on why these values matter and how they influence your daily actions.
2. Intrinsic Interests:
Are any of your daily activities driven by internal motivation? Intrinsic motivation refers to activities that are naturally enjoyable and meaningful rather than performed due to external pressure or rewards. Try incorporating more intrinsically rewarding activities into your routine.
3. Relationships:
Who are the key people in your life, and what makes them special to you? Consider ways to strengthen your close connections with these individuals.
4. Social Contributions:
Does your work or behavior positively impact others? Reflect on how your actions, attitude, and goals contribute to others' well-being and happiness.
5. Life Narrative:
Think of your life as a book with unique chapters. What happened in the opening chapters? Where are you now? What needs to happen next? What lessons have you learned? Does your story have an overarching theme?
6. Goals:
What are your life goals? These might include goals related to relationships, career, education, health, or hobbies. Use your values and interests to set both short-term and long-term goals that feel achievable and meaningful.
By aligning with our interests, pursuing meaningful goals, and crafting our personal stories, we can meet essential psychological needs, leading to lives that feel more cohesive, authentic, and fulfilling.
Becoming the Hero of Your Story
The second strategy involves embracing the mindset of being the central character in your life’s story.
We often perceive our lives as unfolding narratives in which we play roles. Sometimes, we see ourselves as key characters those who drive the plot, make significant decisions, and influence others’ lives. Other times, we see ourselves as minor characters, passive observers controlled by events and people around us.
Recent research by Goffredi and Sheldon, published in the 'Journal of Research in Personality,' shows that seeing yourself as a major character in your story positively affects well-being and fulfills core psychological needs like autonomy, competence, and connection.
Key Findings
The researchers conducted three studies:
1. The first examined the link between feeling like a major or minor character and long-term well-being.
2. The second asked participants to recall times when they felt like major or minor characters to see how this affected well-being and psychological need fulfillment.
3. The third explored the relationship between pursuing self-driven goals and viewing oneself as a significant character in their life story. It also investigated the role of a sense of agency.
The studies found that individuals who saw themselves as significant characters in their stories reported higher levels of well-being, a stronger sense of agency, and more fulfillment of psychological needs. Conversely, those who viewed themselves as minor characters felt less capable and less able to meet their essential psychological needs.
Exercise: Embrace Your Role as the Hero
Think of a time when you felt like a significant character in your life story or someone else’s. Examples include:
- Taking charge at work.
- Confronting someone who was acting unfairly.
- Helping your team reach their goals.
- Getting accepted into schools or landing a job.
- Organizing an important event like a wedding, birthday party, or vacation.
Ask yourself:
- What was the situation?
- What actions did you take?
- How did your decisions shape the outcome?
Reflect on how it felt to be in control of your destiny and valuable to others. Relive that sense of empowerment and stay with it for a moment.
Finally, consider how this experience influenced your sense of purpose, happiness, and well-being.
Conclusion
Both life shaping and viewing yourself as the hero of your story are powerful strategies for improving your happiness and living a meaningful life. By taking intentional steps to shape your life and embracing your role as the central character, you can unlock a greater sense of fulfillment, autonomy, and purpose.