Intimate partner violence can cause serious harm, leaving lasting damage on the lives of victims. The physical abuse often goes beyond just the pain it causes it creates a toxic dynamic between the abuser and the victim. The person inflicting the harm dehumanizes their partner, attacking their physical and mental well-being. The abuser's sense of power comes from controlling and hurting another person, with the victim's body serving as a tool for their aggression. The visible injuries left behind can act as evidence of the abuser's control, showcasing their ability to harm their partner whenever they choose.
Some of the damage is internal and invisible, like psychological trauma or brain injuries. Studies show a high percentage of women in domestic violence situations suffer from these injuries. Other injuries, however, are more visible. Some abusers leave physical evidence of their control, such as scars or bruises, to mark their ownership over their partner. These marks serve as a reminder that they can use and harm their partner's body as they see fit. In some cases, the scars symbolize the abuser's desire to destroy their partner's physical appearance, marking them as damaged.
The areas of the body that are harmed also carry significance. Some abusers avoid causing visible injuries on the face to prevent raising suspicion and potential intervention from authorities. Instead, they focus on parts of the body hidden by clothing. For example, some abusers may use strangulation, leaving minimal physical marks, often accompanied by sexual assault. Others might use objects like towels that leave little evidence, or inflict harm on sensitive areas like the inner thighs or upper arms, where bruising might not be immediately visible. These subtle signs, like burn marks or fingerprint bruises, are telltale indicators of physical violence.
In many cases, the abuser's goal isn’t to leave visible marks but to instill pain and control. Some abusers have admitted to getting a sense of power from the feeling of hitting their partner in vulnerable areas like the stomach. These feelings of control make them want to continue the abuse, denying the pain and suffering they're causing. While the marks left behind may not always be intentional, the primary objective is to dominate their partner, with little regard for the lasting bruises.
For some abusers, leaving marks on their victims is the intended outcome. The classic image of domestic abuse involves a man raising his fist to a woman, leaving her with a black eye. The bruise becomes both physical and symbolic evidence of his control over her body. The visible injury speaks volumes about the abuse she endured. Some women avoid going out in public after these attacks, or they try to hide the bruises with makeup or sunglasses. The shame and fear of judgment can isolate them further, while the abuser feels satisfied knowing they’ve restricted their partner’s movements. The visible injuries serve as proof of their power.
In some cases, abusers are driven by their own internal struggles, such as feelings of inadequacy or shame. Unable to take control of their own lives, they seek to assert dominance over someone else. The excitement or satisfaction gained from leaving marks is rarely admitted, but some abusers have confessed to these feelings during therapy. They might express shame or guilt afterward, but in the moment, they feel powerful by leaving a lasting impact on someone more vulnerable, such as a partner or child.
Deliberate disfigurement can occur in the most extreme cases of intimate partner violence. In 2011 in the U.K., Shane Jenkins gouged out the eyes of his partner, Tina Nash, in a final, brutal attack. Tina, a mother of two, had been beaten unconscious and permanently blinded. She later described waking up feeling as though she was being buried alive, suffocated by darkness. Jenkins told her during the 12-hour assault that she would never see her children again, and tragically, his face was the last one she ever saw.